Friday, November 03, 2006
The recent “Open Mouth and Insert Foot” award recepient, one John Forbes Kerry, has for a short time, breathed new life in the sagging hopes of the Republican party machine. They (Mr. Rove, et al,) are on their knees thanking whatever god they pray to for the erstwhile Democratic presidential candidate’s botching of a poor joke aimed at the president, but veering off and seemingly landing like a mortar shell in front of our beloved US Soldiers. Certainly, Mr. Kerry’s remarks were ill-timed and even spoken as he intended, a really lame joke. Everyone already knows of the mental fortitude of our Commander-in-Chief. So an attempt at a laugh at old news, bought the Republicans some much need relief from the real world.
What's happened to the Republican Party? Are they so bereft of substance that the President of the United States must resort to calling John Kerry shameful and demanding he apologize to the troops for the statement that was not intended for them in the first place? The other item they seem to be using more and more is as my colleague over on the Red Column just posted today, that the "terrorists want the Democrats to win". Really, how infantile and petulant the Republicans have become.
This political party used to be something to behold. They were crisp on message and had a truckload of ideas and plans (Where are you now Mr. Gingrich?). Now, they are the Keystone Cops, The Gang That Couldn't Shoot Straight, The Three Stooges (George, Dick and Don, anyway). Congress used to be run like an Italian railroad under Mussolini. The trains ran on time. Now they can't get to work, don't read the legislation they vote on, have to scramble to cover up scandal after scandal and can't think up anything substantive a week before an election that should be the crowning prologue to 6 years of Republican rule so what do they do? They riff on John Kerry. How pitiful, how awful for them, how absurd they have become. Reagan's Republicans have now become a laughing stock of political ineptitude. They are about to have their clock cleaned on election day by a political party that has historically been completely dis-organized and more prone for mis-steps than anyone. However, the Democrats have one thing going for them in this election. The Republicans are even more pathetic than they are. Reagan must be spinning in his grave. How bad do you think Howard Baker, Bob Michel, Alan Simpson and other strong and competent Republicans feel when they realize they had to work in the minority for most of their career and can only watch with clowns like Dennis Hastert, Bil Frist, John Boehner, take what they never had (a lock on the leadership) and sail it like the Titanic into an Iceberg all the while taking shots at Mr. Kerry.
Robert Ney, Tom Delay, Mark Foley, Randall (Duke Cunningham), Bill Janklow, (one could go on and on and on) are the former Republican Titans (like Everett Dirkson, the aforementioned Howard Baker, Warren Rudman) unfortunate legacy. Even those without scandals attached to them like Rick Santorum, Conrad Burns, and Katherine Harris simply look and sound like idiots when they open their mouths. How awful for those great Republicans to see their party taken over by a bunch of incompetents.
This congress has enjoyed a unity government for most of the President's term. Instead of really doing something well for the country they've succeeded in driving us so far into debt that we'll probably not see a surplus again in my lifetime. They have us mired in a war that seems to be without end. They botched relief of a disaster area so poorly that the new acronym for FUBAR and SNAFU is FEMA. I can only imagine what Teddy Roosevelt would do if he was still alive. I suspect he'd revive the Rough Riders and charge up Pennsylvania Avenue instead of San Juan Hill.
This Republican party may squeak by Tuesday and retain control of the house. It won't be for the lack of trying to give it away though.